The beginning

Leading Learning Serving, I decided to join this program as a new beginning you could say. As for this class well if you would all forgive me on how technologically challenged I am, it's still taking me some time to get adjusted to this wiki page. Anyways in high school I wasn't really involved as much as I could have been and when I was walking down the stage with my graduating class I realized how little I did all my high school years. It made me a bit sad to know how many things I could have done not just for myself but for my community. Yet I let other things in my life take up more of my time than they should have. Seeing this already having graduated I promised myself that it would be different once I got to college. It's never too late, you never lose anything if you try. When I read what this program was about it really caught my attention. I've always been very big on leadership and helping my community. I thought this was the perfect opportunity to start off fresh, doing something different and being able to stand out. To make a difference doesn't always mean to raise millions of dollars for a certain organization or spending every minute of every day doing community hours, it just means stepping out of your "You" bubble and giving someone else a hand, making someones day, you never know how much a nice gesture can change someones mood. I feel as though I can make a difference just because I'd like to change someones life, completly. I hope to be able to say that I made a difference to not 100 people but just to one. It's all about quality not quantity. It's also not about naming how many awards we've gotten, how much community hours we've had or even how much money we've raised, because when it comes down to it we do it not expecting anything back but just for the pleasure of knowing YOU made a difference and changed someone elses life.
As for the $5,000, well that's a lot of money. I'm really interested in helping out women who have been abused. Mentally,physically & emotionally.  Not many people pay much attention to this, but it's such a big problem. It catches my attention because some of these women that are abused don't realize that there is another way out, that they don't have to stay with someone who treats them like that. Who hits them or uses words to hurt them. That there is another path to take, and with help they can be on their own and back to normal. Or in other cases girls who have been raped and have nowhere to go or nobody to talk to. I'm not quite sure which organization helps with these situations but I am looking into it. As a girl I feel as though no guy should abuse a woman, in ANY way. I hope that I can use my abilities to make a difference in my community and I am able to change someones life. -Estefi(:

I'm glad you gave us an introduction and explained your motive for joining this class. I agreed with you about things that maybe we could have done in high school, but didn't think of them until graduation. Whew! I really love the way you defined helping the community because those are the ways society usually wants to get involved and help. Many people don't have the funds and materials to give up to help people, but little things are the ones that matter the most. I also agree where you say that abused women are somewhat put on the back burner. Nobody talks about helping them because most of them are afraid to get help. They also feel as though they are not a "victim" of abuse, especially when it is not physical. I have a friend who I think is abused by her lame boyfriend. He's pushed her a few times and messes with her emotions a little too much. Of course, she doesn't see a problem. There are so many people in the world that need help with this. When they search for the help, they should have somewhere to go to get the counseling they need. 5,000 dollars is a lot to go to them, but I'm sure it will be used in a multitude of ways. Maybe they could get the word out to more abused women and they will flock to the help centers. Good way to start!

- Jasmyne B.

Well written, I think that you should try to relate making a difference to domestic violence earlier. Paper seems not to have a course but will once until you do. I know Eminemn song love the way you lie, was said to have cause controversy because it supposedly made domestic violence look sexy.  What are your opinions on this? Is domestic violence  to widespread in the media. What are reasons women put up with domestic violence? Does Domestic violence only happen to women? I can't wait to hear more on this subject.-Aberlyna Danelle <3

I totally like that you put this song on not because I like what's being said in this song but because many women can relate to this song to their abusive relationships. But it really makes me sad to think that some artist promote such violence, not only because so many people look up to them but others might see it as an okay thing to do. The media definitely makes violence known and it's not okay. It's not sexy or cool to lay a hand on a girl, not even in a music video. But I pulled up the lyrics, I only found it fair. To actually understand the song you have to read this a couple of times. I felt that what this song was also implying was that even though their relationship is so toxic and crazy that it's okay because they love each other, when it's not okay to abuse another person because you feel as though you can't control them. Especially your girlfriend,wife or whoever you might be with. Sadly these men that do this aren't aware of how much pain they cause these women. If you LOVE someone you don't abuse them, physically,mentally OR emotionally. Also these women stick with them and don't leave because they feel as though it's them that are doing something wrong, that it is their fault that they're beating them. It's like in their mind they're the bad person in the picture and they deserve what comes their way. The men who do this are also very manipulative and convince them and brainwash them to think what they want them to think. Others are alcoholics or have anger issues.

"I love the way you lie"

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

I can't tell you what it really is
I can only tell you what it feels like
And right now there's a steel knife
In my windpipe
I can't breathe
But I still fight
While I can fight
As long as the wrong feels right
It's like I'm in flight
High of a love
Drunk from the hate
It's like I'm huffing paint
And I love it the more that I suffer
I sufficate
And right before im about to drown
She resuscitates me
She fucking hates me
And I love it
Wait
Where you going
I'm leaving you
No you ain't
Come back
We're running right back
Here we go again
It's so insane
Cause when it's going good
It's going great
I'm Superman
With the wind in his bag
She's Lois Lane
But when it's bad
It's awful
I feel so ashamed
I snap
Who's that dude
I don't even know his name
I laid hands on her
I'll never stoop so low again
I guess I don't know my own strength

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

You ever love somebody so much
You can barely breathe
When you're with them
You meet
And neither one of you
Even know what hit 'em
Got that warm fuzzy feeling
Yeah them chills
Used to get 'em
Now you're getting fucking sick
Of looking at 'em
You swore you've never hit 'em
Never do nothing to hurt 'em
Now you're in each other's face
Spewing venom
And these words
When you spit 'em
You push
Pull each other's hair
Scratch, claw, bit 'em
Throw 'em down 
Pin 'em
So lost in the moments
When you're in 'em
It's the rage that took over
It controls you both
So they say it's best
To go your separate ways
Guess that they don't know ya
Cause today
That was yesterday
Yesterday is over
It's a different day
Sound like broken records
Playin' over
But you promised her
Next time you'll show restraint
You don't get another chance
Life is no Nintendo game
But you lied again
Now you get to watch her leave
Out the window
Guess that's why they call it window pane

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

Now I know we said things
Did things
That we didn't mean
And we fall back
Into the same patterns
Same routine
But your temper's just as bad
As mine is
You're the same as me
But when it comes to love
You're just as blinded
Baby please come back
It wasn't you
Baby it was me
Maybe our relationship
Isn't as crazy as it seems
Maybe that's what happens
When a tornado meets a volcano
All I know is
I love you too much
To walk away though
Come inside
Pick up your bags off the sidewalk
Don't you hear sincerity
In my voice when I talk
Told you this is my fault
Look me in the eyeball
Next time I'm pissed
I'll aim my fist
At the dry wall
Next time
There will be no next time
I apologize
Even though I know it's lies
I'm tired of the games
I just want her back
I know I'm a liar
If she ever tries to fucking leave again
I'mma tie her to the bed
And set the house on fire

Just gonna stand there
And watch me burn
But that's alright
Because I like
The way it hurts
Just gonna stand there
And hear me cry
But that's alright
Because I love
The way you lie
I love the way you lie
I love the way you lie

      Ever since we were all little kids we were told to never hit a girl, girls are delicate and fragile. Growing up listening to lectures given to us by our parents,grandparents, other family members and even teachers about treating girls with respect and no rough play. Having this background helps me transition to a cause that catches my attention. Even though there are different causes that numerous people decide to write about that they think are important to help out. They include the environment, homelessness & orphans. I on the other hand decided to write about another cause that I believe deserves just as much awareness as the ones above. Abused women. This is something that I believe affects countless amounts of lives each and every day. The women that are involved with abuse don't realize what is truly happening for a long period of time. It might take months or even years for women to open their eyes to the types of conditions they have been living under. Domestic violence could be said to be a pattern of abusive behavior in any kind of relationship when used by one partner to gain or maintain power and to have control over the other person. In various cases women don't know that they ARE being abused by their partners and will deny to themselves what is happening. Along with the injustice they are being put through they will blame themselves  for getting hit or punched, and at times even held at gunpoint.Their partner will make them feel as though they are the cause of the problem.The manipulation that men have over women goes to the extent that the women will start believing they deserve to be bruised every night because it is their fault. Reality, it is NOT okay, nor is it okay to apologize time after time for the same mistake.

    In most cases the women will refuse to leave their partners because they're on dependent on them. It's like a drug to them and if they stop they'll feel as though their going through withdrawal. We live in a stereotypical world in which women are viewed as the weaker sex which is why they have a higher percentage of abuse instead of men. Many women who are abused, not just by their partner but by people they might know choose not to report what happens to them in many cases because they're scared. More people should be aware of what a scary thing this is, to not know the pain some women can be carrying at this exact moment and are terrified to come out and say what has happened to them. I feel that our community should be more aware of these situations. Not just women who are emotionally and physically hurt but also raped. These women need help, they need to be told that they deserve a better life for themselves and that it is possible to move on. Not forget, because an experience like this is a lesson to be learned and carried in their minds forever, but to live a better life and be happy. Not just the temporary happy that they're used to in these toxic relationships or not even in relationships because other times women are beaten by other males, but to be fully happy and be able to talk to someone about what happened to them and feel better about it. Furthermore, to more intense cases, offering women and girls shelter; somewhere they could stay and feel safe.

  With the help of the community I would like to create awareness to more people about these cases and get other people involved. It is important to know about this type of abuse because it is violence and if we don't try to do something about this now it will get to a point where it gets way out of hands. The death rate of women killed by their husbands,boyfriends or partners will continue to go up. There is enough violence in the world we live in as it is, this shouldn't add up to it. Just taking a step forward to try to help women that have been hurt is important. As a girl, it truly scares me to know that there is such violent attacks towards other women in this country. So many times  the pain being silent and nobody knowing about it. Helping with this cause would make our community a better place. Not just to reduce the abuse towards women but also violent overall.

Some statistics

•Nearly 2 in 3 female victims of violence were related to or knew their attacker.

•Over two-thirds of violent victimizations against women were committed by someone known to them: 31% of female victims reported that the offender was a stranger. Approximately 28% were intimates such as husbands or boyfriends, 35% were acquaintances, and the remaining 5% were other relatives. (In contrast, victimizations by intimates and other relatives accounted for only 5% of all violent victimizations against men. Men were significantly more likely to have been victimized by acquaintances (50%) or strangers (44%) than by intimates or other relatives.) (p. 1)

•Almost 6 times as many women victimized by intimates (18%) as those victimized by strangers (3%) did not report their violent victimization to police because they feared reprisal from the offender. (p. 1)

•Annually, compared to males, females experienced over 10 times as many incidents of violence by an intimate.

-Women experience about 4.8 million intimate partner-related physical assaults and rapes every year.

Less than 20 percent of battered women sought medical treatment following an injury

THE TARGETS

Young women, low-income women and some minorities are disproportionately victims of domestic violence and rape. Women ages 20-24 are at greatest risk of nonfatal domestic violence and women age 24 and under suffer from the highest rates of rape.The Justice Department estimates that one in five women will experience rape or attempted rape during their college years, and that less than five percent of these rapes will be reported. Income is also a factor: the poorer the household, the higher the rate of domestic violence -- with women in the lowest income category experiencing more than six times the rate of nonfatal intimate partner violence as compared to women in the highest income category.When we consider race, we see that African-American women face higher rates of domestic violence than white women, and American-Indian women are victimized at a rate more than double that of women of other races

• Of the almost 3.5 million violent crimes committed against family members, 49% of these were crimes against spouses.
• 84% of spouse abuse victims were females, and 86% of victims of dating partner abuse at were female.
• Males were 83% of spouse murderers and 75% of dating partner murderers
• 50% of offenders in state prison for spousal abuse had killed their victims. Wives were more likely than husbands to be killed by their spouses: wives were about half of all spouses in the population in 2002, but 81% of all persons killed by their spouse.

• 7% of women (3.9 million) are physically abused by their partners, and 37% (20.7 million) are verbally or emotionally abused.

• Every 9 seconds a woman is physically abused by her husband.

• 95% of assaults on spouses or ex-spouses are committed by men against women.

• 30% of women presenting with injuries to the emergency department had injuries caused by battering.

• From 7% to 26% of pregnant women are abused.

• 42% of murdered women are killed by their intimate partners.

• Within the last year, 7% of American women (3.9 million) who are married or living with someone as a couple were physically abused, and 37% (20.7 million) were verbally or emotionally abused by their spouse or partner. (The Commonwealth Fund, N.Y. 1991)

• Every 9 seconds a woman is physically abused by her husband. (The Commonwealth Fund, N.Y. 1991)

• The U.S. Department of Justice estimates that 95% of assaults on spouses or ex-spouses are committed by men against women. (Assessing Violent Couples, H. Douglas, Families in Society, 11/91)

• Domestic violence is a repetitive in nature: about 1 in 5 women victimized by their spouse or ex-spouse reported that they had been a victim of a series of at least 3 assaults in the last 6 months. (Bureau of Justice Statistics, 10/93)

• 30% of Women presenting with injuries to the emergency department were identified as having injuries caused by battering. (American Journal of Public Health, 1/89)

• Pregnancy is a risk factor. Several studies indicate a range of incidence from 17% to 26% of pregnant women. (Public Health Nursing, 9/87)

• 42% of murdered women are killed by their intimate partners. (FBI's 88-91 Uniform Crime Reports)