Jon,

I know that the material you posted consists of rough drafts, so I am not going to comment on the grammatical errors. Based on my reading of your work, it appears that you have created a kind of hybrid document, part research proposal, part position paper, part research study results. I think you are planning the paper as an exploration of the study's results, is that correct? If so, large sections of the proposal language will need to come out. Your literature review could benefit from more sources that specifically relate to your media-based lesson plans, instructional approaches for metacognition, and (if you can find it), existing surveys which measure teacher attitudes (I know ACT has one). You may already have these sources; they just haven't been posted on the wiki. That's ok. Again, I know that I am not looking at a finalized document :)

Here are three overarching ideas/concerns/themes I see developing in your work:

            1) the exact nature of educators' attitudes and beliefs about their students' communities and their students' literacy skills/capabilities

            2) the varying instructional approaches to fostering metacognition  in both teachers and students

            3) critique of public education structures and the call for media-based lesson plans to supplant traditional, teacher-centered approaches (specifically in                                           college-level remedial reading classes)

Each of these three ideas are broad enough for their own individual papers. I think the three of them can mesh together. It's going to take a lot of control over your writing though. I see some possible structural issues. Personally, I view the whole section involving apprenticeship versus institutionalized education as a digression. It's compelling stuff, for sure, but I wonder about the paper's priorities. Are you writing to disclose educational history for critique or are you writing to shed light on the specific solution of media-based lesson plans?

There are moments in the drafts when I am not sure if you are referring to teachers or students. Again, that is probably just a structural issue, and since this is a rough draft, I'll put that confusion aside. Your ideas and arguments are compelling, they just need support, particularly in how media-based lesson plans activate students' prior knowledge and how that translates into student achievement in literacy.

I do take exception to your description of interaction with the arts as "effortless acceptance". The arts are very much a matter of aesthetics and cultural values; we cannot guarantee that every student's response to a work of art will be "effortless", or for that matter, a response of "acceptance".

One last bit of food for thought, if the purpose of this paper is to reveal the results of the survey and take those results as the basis for further insight/research into the potential for media-based lesson plans, you may need to provide some definitions specific to your study. These terms include: 'attitudes', 'community knowledge', and 'use of media'.

Good luck!

-Meghan

To check out Jon's work, click here.